black tie

So, I’ve got a serious yuppie problem.  I’m attending my first (and maybe last) black tie event next week.  I’m fretting about two things: what to wear and what the heck to say to people.

I am getting into the event for free as a result of being in the Downtown Denver Partnership Leadership Program.  It’s meant to be a benefit and an opportunity to connect with people to whom you wouldn’t normally have access. That’s great if you have any networking skills.  I’m an amateur networker.  One of my dear co-workers has assured me that I do interesting things both professionally and personally and people will want to hear about them.  But, whatever, I’ll figure that talking part out.  The real obstacle is what to wear!

I’ve been informed that this isn’t an event so formal as to have long gowns  worn but that a cocktail dress will do the trick.  I don’t have any dresses really.  I don’t have panty hose. I don’t have dress heels.  My only watch is a Timex IronMan.  I work for a public agency for goodness sakes!  I don’t have to look great – I get away with Dansko shoes and look (comparatively) pretty good most of the time. 

To top it off, I’m not that adventurous in the way of fashion.  So far I’ve purchased a plain, sleeveless, black Ann Taylor dress, which I cannot find online, a silver necklace and a light, gauzy, pink wrap.  Now I need shoes.  I have ankle problems.  Without risk of physical and mental injury, I cannot wear tiny, tall heels. 

Let me close this ridiculous post by saying once again that I know I have a good life and realize these are NOT real problems.